The Gift ~ Part 3
0214 Zulu (2114 EST)
Mac's Apartment
Georgetown
Harm and Mac snuggled up on the floor in front of the crackling fire trying to warm up. Mac had insisted their first Christmas as a couple include a trip to The Wall visiting Harm’s dad.
As Mac sat in the vee of Harm's long legs, his large hands were splayed across her burgeoning abdomen. Mac reveled in his embrace and in his love. She lay relaxed against his broad chest, enjoying the feel of his arms around her and his textured hands against the bare skin of her belly. Harm nuzzled his nose into her neck, placing soft kisses on her sensitive skin. She trembled slightly.
"Something wrong?" he inquired into her ear.
"Everything is just right," she replied.
"Merry Christmas, Mac." He tightened his hold on her. "I love you."
It was the first time he actually said the words to her. She knew he loved her. It was evidenced in all the things he did for her, large and small. He put up with all her moods, he had gone to her prenatal appointments, and never once had he reproached her about the pregnancy.
Mac leaned a bit to the side so she could look at him. "Harm, I love you, too," she said as she pressed a kiss to his mouth. He attempted to deepen their kiss. Unfortunately, their position prevented him from doing much more than licking her lips. This caused her stomach to tighten. She wasn't sure if she could hold out much longer.
They had not yet been intimate since that first, fateful time. There had been several opportunities, but Harm had never taken advantage. Something held him back and she hadn’t quite figured out what, yet. Mac, on the other hand, was experiencing an almost continual state of longing for him since his birthday. She supposed she could have been a little more aggressive about it, but his hesitation held her in check.
Harm scooted around until they were face to face. With the fire behind him, his face was shadowed, but not so much so that Mac couldn’t read the desire in his eyes. It was time. He kissed her tenderly, putting all that he was into it. "Mac..."
Her senses were overwhelmed as he whispered her name. It was a declaration of his intentions. Mac inhaled slowly as she waited for heaven to come to her. She had waited four months for this. No, she had waited a lifetime for this.
Mac watched Harm sleep and wondered about the child she carried. Would it be a boy or a girl? Would it look like Harm or like her? Maybe it would have a combination of their features. She wanted a boy. A son that looked just like his father and his grandfather before him.
1837 Zulu (1537 EST)
OB/GYN Ultrasound Room
Bethesda Naval Medical Center
Five months down, four months to go. Mac lay on the exam bed with her shirt pulled up to reveal her pregnant belly. Harm stood by the bedside and held her hand while the doctor prepared to do the ultrasound. They watched intently as Major Boudreaux flipped a couple switches and adjusted a few knobs. Mac inhaled sharply as he squirted cold gel across the bottom section of her stomach. He then used the end of the wand to spread the gel around. Within seconds blurry gray images appeared on the monitor.
The doctor continued to move the wand around pressing firmly into Mac's abdomen to get an accurate, clear picture of the baby. "Look, there's the heart, folks. Good heartbeat, very nice." He turned his head to smile at Mac. "It may be a little early to tell, but I could try to see the genitalia."
Harm nodded, but Mac shook her head. The doctor looked back and forth between them with raised eyebrows.
"Never mind, it's not that big a deal," Harm said to the doctor and patted Mac's hand. Mac gave him a small smile.
"Okay, we're done. I want to see you back in a month," Major Boudreaux said to Mac as he shut down the equipment. Harm helped Mac clean the gel off her stomach with several paper towels and then helped her off the table. After stopping at the main desk to schedule her next appointment, they walked quietly out to the car.
"I didn't know you wanted to find out what it was." Mac turned to face Harm.
"I just thought it would be fun to know ahead of time whether to buy pink airplanes or blue ones for the nursery." Harm's comment elicited a wan smile from her. "Why didn't you want to find out?”
"I want a boy so bad, Harm," she replied. "I don't want to be disappointed yet. I know I'll love it no matter what, once it's born and I can hold it in my arms. But, if I found out now that it was a girl, I'd be really disappointed and I just want to be happy about it. I know that sounds stupid and petty and very unmaternal." A lone tear slid down her cheek.
"It's alright, Mac." Harm wiped away the moisture and smiled reassuringly at her before heading toward home.
0000 Zulu (1900 EST)
Harm's Apartment
North of Union Station
The overwhelming scent and sight of so many roses assaulted Mac as she stepped inside Harm's apartment. There were bouquets and bunches and buds all over the place in various color combinations.
"Oh, my... Harm?" She delicately sniffed a red bloom here, an orange bloom there, as she picked her way through the room toward the bedroom. "Harm, where are you?" she called again.
He emerged from his bedroom carrying a dozen orange and yellow roses. Harm closed the distance between them and placed a tantalizing kiss upon her waiting mouth. "Mmm..." he said as the kiss ended. "I've been waiting all afternoon to do that. Happy Valentine’s Day."
"What is all this?" She gestured around the room.
"They're roses."
"I can see that, but why all the different colors and numbers?" She buried her nose into the bouquet he held. "Why, Harm, there must be five hundred flowers in here."
"Six-hundred seventy two, actually." He set the vase down on a small table. "I'm sure you know that certain colors have a certain meaning, but did you know that the number of flowers in an arrangement also has meaning?"
She shook her head as he continued. "A dozen roses is considered the ultimate declaration of love, that is why there are twelve dozens." Harm put his arm around her and escorted her back the way she had come. They stopped in front of a huge arrangement of red roses. "Now, fifty roses tell of unconditional love and so you should count four 50 rose bouquets."
She surveyed the room once again before fixing her eyes back on Harm. "How do you know all this?" She couldn't believe that he had done this or that he knew about the language of roses.
"I did a little research. May I continue?" She nodded this time.
Harm looked around to refresh his memory. "Let's see... a single rose says I love you. And I do, Mac, I love you so much." He stared into her eyes trying to tell her how much since no words could accurately describe the depth.
She was mesmerized by the blue, captivated by the intensity of the emotion she saw reflected there. She wondered how this had come to be. She felt her own emotions rising and the tears pooling.
He kissed her again, this time more deeply. Trying to pour his love into her through his kiss. He pulled away, holding her gaze for a long moment before speaking.
"Red means love, which I'm sure you know." He propelled her forward to another grand effusion of color. "Pink roses indicate perfect happiness. Mac, do you know how happy I am? I never thought, in all my life, I'd feel this way."
The tears coursed down her cheeks at this point. He looked around and pointed to a red and white combination. "These two colors when put together symbolize unity. You are my other half and I didn't know it was missing until we met. Ever since that day I have felt so at peace. I want us to be together forever, Mac."
Realization came to her.
"Standing alone, white represents purity. My love for you is marred by nothing, not jealousy, not past regrets, nothing. And I promise that it will remain pure and true."
Mac stood still amidst the blooms waiting.
"The mixture of orange and yellow I had before was to tell you of the many passionate thoughts I have of you. But these..." Harm indicated one of the largest groups of flowers in the room. "These orange and coral roses when paired together are a representation of desire. My desire for you and the desire I see reflected in your eyes for me."
Mac looked around at all the colors and sizes of the arrangements. She saw the four 50 rose bouquets; one in red, one in pink, one in white, and one filled with the yellow and coral.
The dozen rose arrangements were also of the various colors he had explained to her. She wiped the tears off her face and followed Harm with her eyes. He stepped into the kitchen and reached into the fridge. He walked back over to where she stood hiding something behind his back.
"Last, but not least..." He cleared his throat and brought his offering from behind him. "Peach roses symbolize coming together, while two roses intertwined indicate an engagement." Harm dropped to one knee. "Will you marry me?"
Mac accepted the two perfect flowers and held them to her nose. The tears fell once again and all she could do was nod.
April 22, 2001
1400 Zulu (0900 EST)
Vietnam Veterans Memorial
In front of the panel that contains the name of Lt. Harmon Rabb, Sr.
It was a brilliant spring morning. The sun shone brightly, glinting off the black granite of The Wall. The air was crisp and fresh with the smell of newly mown grass. The gay twitters and chirps of the spring birds provided a lovely musical backdrop.
Harm and Judge Blakely approached the fifteen or so guests they’d invited. Some wore formal military uniforms while others had on civilian formal wear appropriate for the occasion.
As they took their places, Harm extended his hand. "Thanks so much for being here this morning. It means a lot to Mac and me." Harm turned to the rest of the group. "Thanks to all of you as well. Mac and I are so glad you all came." He glanced quickly at his watch and nodded to the judge.
A few moments later, the group turned as whole to watch the approach of the bride. It wasn't a traditional wedding gown. She wore a simple but elegant white tea-length dress covered with seed pearls that sparkled in the sunlight. A crown of white roses sat atop her dark head, her glossy curls bounced slightly as she walked. The winter white roses she carried reminded Harm of another day many years ago.
Mac had eyes only for him. Her gaze remained riveted on him alone.
Harm watched her as she walked; poised, confident, stunning. His eyes dropped to their child. Her advanced pregnancy added to the aura surrounding her. Just a few more steps and she was in front of him. He leaned over to place a gentle kiss on her smiling lips.
The guests formed a half circle around them. Harriet came for the bouquet as Harm and Mac faced each other, holding hands. Their family and friends were on one side, the judge was on the other and The Wall stood sentinel in the background.
"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to witness the marriage of Harmon Rabb, Junior and Sarah MacKenzie. In this solemn place, we rejoice and share in the love discovered and cherished by these two people. Today, Harm has asked that he be allowed to speak his own heart to his bride."
So far, Mac had been able to keep from weeping, smiling instead of expressing her profound happiness with uncontrollable tears. She gazed up at the man of her dreams who was looking at her with such concentration. She held her breath as he started to speak.
"Sarah, as we stand here before our family and friends, who probably thought they'd never see this day..." A few low chuckles rippled through the assemblage. "We pledge our lives and love to each other. I never realized when we met in the rose garden that I had just met my destiny."
Harm paused for a moment seeing the tear form and then fall down Mac's cheek. He wiped it away with a tender touch as he continued, "We have traveled many roads, some together, some separately, to finally reach this point. As we begin our life together and anticipate the birth of our child..." He reverently touched Mac's stomach. "I want you to know how very much I love you both. Your love and this child are the most precious gifts I have ever received." His voice broke as he uttered the last words. "Semper Fi, Mac. I love you."
The only sounds heard were that of the birds singing sweetly all around and the soft click of a camera as it captured this moment of declaration. The judge waited patiently for the right moment to continue the ceremony. Harm indicated he was ready with a barely perceptible nod of his head.
"The exchange of rings is a time honored ceremony, an outward display of a personal commitment to love, honor, and cherish till death do you part. The gold symbolizes the perfection and preciousness of love while the circular band symbolizes the never-ending quality of that love. Sarah please take this ring, slide it onto the fourth finger of Harmon's left hand and speak your troth."
Mac accepted the plain golden band from the judge and slipped it on Harm's ring finger, "With this ring, I thee wed..."
"Harm, please take this ring and slide it onto the fourth finger of Sarah's left hand and speak your troth." The judge handed Harm the second plain gold band.
Harm held Mac's left hand gently in his right. As he pushed the ring up to its final resting place, Harm echoed Mac's words. "With this ring, I thee wed..."
"As these two have consented before God and this company, I am pleased to pronounce them husband and wife. What God has joined together let no man put asunder. Commander, you may kiss your bride."
Everyone watched and waited with baited breath as the bride and groom shared a look of such intensity. Slowly the groom bent toward his bride closing the distance between them. The look ended as arms encircled, lips met, and eyes fluttered shut.
Harm kissed his bride with little regard for onlookers. His mouth feasted on her lips, his tongue dipping and tasting the sweet recesses of her mouth, swirling and probing until he felt her meld against him. Harm ended his kiss and looked once again into the eyes of his beloved.
"It is my great honor and delight to present Commander and Mrs. Harmon Rabb." The judge smiled as he watched the small group of witnesses crowd around the bride and groom. A smattering of applause was heard from strangers, having come to the memorial in remembrance of lost loved ones, but given a reason to smile and celebrate.
Three and a half weeks later
1517 Zulu (1017 EST)
Harm & Mac's apartment
Georgetown
Mac lay sprawled out on the couch flipping through the channels. She had been housebound for a week and half. The doctor had ordered her to begin her maternity leave on her due date if she hadn’t delivered by then. She was so bored; she missed the action of the office as well as the interaction with her co-workers.
She shifted her position on the couch trying to relieve the ache in her lower back, which had been with her since before dawn. She was disgusted with the daytime TV offerings and clicked the thing off with a quick push on the remote.
Mac felt like a beached whale as her enormous belly severely restricted her movements. It took her awhile to achieve an upright position once again. The phone rang just at that moment and she reached across to the coffee table to grab the cordless phone. "Hello," she said breathlessly.
"Mac. Are you alright?" Harm's voice was filled with worry.
"I'm fine, Harm, for the second time." Mac's annoyance crept into her voice. This was the second time he'd called her that morning. "I'm a Marine for heaven's sake. I think I can handle being nine months pregnant. I may not be enjoying it right now, but I can handle it!"
"Why are you out of breath?" Harm ignored her outburst.
"I just sat up, that's all. Don't you have work to do, Commander?" Mac affected her best authoritative voice.
"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked. She rolled her eyes, although she knew he worried about her being this far along—10 days overdue and home alone.
"I'm going to make some tea and lay down for a nap. I'll call you if I need something." Mac's voice softened. "I love you, Commander Rabb."
"I love you, too, Colonel Rabb," he replied before hanging up the phone.
Mac pushed the button and set the phone on the couch beside her. Using both arms, she pushed herself up off couch. She shuffled to the kitchen and set the kettle to boil. After perusing the contents of the fridge and the freezer, Mac decided to call Harm later and have him pick dinner up on the way home. She poured the boiling water over her teabag and added a pinch of sugar.
Mac got halfway to the bedroom when she felt a trickle of liquid run down her leg. "What the hell?" She bent over a bit to try and see what was going on but her baby blocked her view. Continuing on to the bathroom, Mac suddenly realized that her water must have just broken. "Oh, my. I guess I'd better call Harm now.
"Rabb!" She held the phone away from her ear.
"Harm, can you come home now?"
"What's the matter?" Harm shouted into the receiver.
"My water just broke, I need to go to the hospital now," she continued as if she were discussing the weather.
"Okay, I'll be home in twenty minutes. If anything changes call me on my cell." His voice was so loud that everyone in the office was looking at him. He slammed the hand set into the cradle, grabbed his cover and headed to the elevators, calling as he went, "Mac's gone into labor, I'll call when the baby's born. Gunny, will you notify the admiral?"
Harm barely heard Gunny's "aye, aye, Sir" as the double doors swished closed behind him.
May 16, 2001
1210 Zulu (0710 EST)
Labor and Delivery
Bethesda Naval Medical Center
Mac gripped Harm's hand so tightly he thought she might break it. Another contraction held her body captive for well over a minute. The doctor walked in as the pain began to recede. He looked intently at the pair in front of him. "Commander Rabb and Colonel MacKenzie, right?"
Mac shook her head wearily as she rested with her eyes closed before the next contraction began.
"Actually, it's Colonel Rabb now," Harm informed the doctor. "We were married three and a half weeks ago."
"Well, I guess congratulations are in order," said Major Boudreaux, the doctor who had performed Mac's ultrasound back in January. "Are you two ready to have a baby?" He glanced over at the monitors noticing that another contraction was beginning. "I'll do a quick internal exam once this one passes," he said and looked over Mac's chart while he was waiting. He also checked the long strip of paper, which recorded the baby's heartbeat. "So, you were admitted yesterday after your water broke at around 1030 yesterday morning?" The doctor glanced at Harm who was concentrating on Mac but nodded affirmatively.
The contraction subsided and Major Boudreaux moved to the end of the delivery bed. He lifted the sheet up just enough to slip his hand and arm in to manually check Mac's progress. "Only six centimeters dilated. How long have you been in labor?"
"Seven hours, thirteen minutes, and forty-three seconds," Mac croaked. The doctor just looked at her in surprise.
"Well, six centimeters dilated is not very good progress for seven and a half hours of hard contractions, especially since your water broke." He reviewed the strip that showed the length and intensity of Mac's contractions. They had started mild enough although they lasted a long time but had gradually increased in strength over the last four hours. "There's a great risk for infection after the twenty-four hour mark. We’ll continue to monitor the baby closely and we'll be checking for dilation every thirty minutes. If things don't begin progressing rapidly in the next two and a half, three hours we'll have to do a c-section."
Harm nodded and Mac closed her eyes as the next tidal wave of pain crashed over her.
Three hours later, Mac was sound asleep as nurses and technicians completed their pre-operative tasks around her. The doctor and anesthesiologist had concurred on the decision to put Mac under. Her lengthy, intensive labor had taken its toll.
Major Boudreaux came into the operating room to find Harm, dressed in surgical scrubs, standing uncertainly next to Mac's head. Harm looked up as the doctor approached.
"Commander, I'll be making the incisions in about five minutes. If you are interested in standing by, you can be the first to hold your baby, barring any complications of course." He looked at Harm expectantly and smiled at the positive response. "The nurse will show you where to stand and will be ready with a sterile drape once I'm ready to place the baby in your arms."
"Thank you, doctor," Harm said as he followed the nurse and did as she instructed.
"No need to thank me, Commander," the doctor replied, "Thank your wife later."
"Right." Harm watched the surgical team begin their work.
He heard the doctor call for a scalpel and saw the initial cuts made into the upper layers of Mac's skin. He listened to the unfamiliar medical jargon passing around the room as Mac's vitals and other pertinent information was relayed to Major Boudreaux.
"Just a few more minutes now, Commander." The doctor startled Harm. "You still with us?"
The nurse told Harm to hold his arms out in front of him and as he did so she hung a surgical drape across his arms. The doctor's hand disappeared inside Mac's body for a moment and in an instant Harm saw a small bottom emerging.
Before he knew it, a tiny squirming mass was deposited into his arms. The nurse quickly folded the excess fabric around the baby and stepped back to allow Harm a private moment. "It's a boy, Sir," she said softly. "Congratulations."
Harm's world narrowed down to the bundle encased in his long arms. He looked into the small face, still covered with muck, at the blue eyes so familiar to him. A boy to carry on the Rabb name and possibly the naval tradition. Mac would be pleased. If the truth were told, he was inordinately glad it was a boy, too.
The baby stilled as Harm's voice reached his ears. "Welcome to the world little one, Semper Fi."
Everyone smiled at the comment. A nurse stepped forward. "I'm sorry, Commander, I need to take him now; get him cleaned up and weighed." She accepted the baby from him. "Does he have a name, yet?"
"Harmon Rabb, the third." His voice was tinged with pride. "But you can call him JR."
~*~
Mac could hear the low hum of machinery around her as well as some distant voices. Her eyes refused to open just yet. She lay quietly and continued to listen. Pretty soon she picked up the rhythmic sound of heavy breathing. A small smile crept across her face as she recognized the sound of Harm asleep.
Mac tried to figure out how long it had been since she had been put out in preparation for the c-section. Unfortunately, the drugs had skewed her internal clock and she had no clue as to the time. Just then the 'squeak, squeak' of rubber against tile alerted her to someone's presence and she turned her head toward the sound.
The nurse caught the movement. "How are you feeling, Colonel?"
She came and checked Mac's vitals and made some notes on the chart. She glanced at large man sleeping soundly in the chair beside the colonel's bed.
Mac opened her mouth to speak, but no sound escaped past her dry throat and parched lips. "I'll wake up your husband and bring you some water." She patted Mac's arm gently.
"Commander..." The nurse gently shook Harm awake. His eyes opened slowly as he attempted to focus on her voice. "Your wife's awake, Sir. She can't open her eyes just yet so don't worry. I'll bring the baby in a few minutes."
Harm stretched mightily before approaching Mac's bedside. "Mac." He leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. "Thank you." She was finally able to open her eyes and she looked up at Harm. She blinked a couple times to clear her vision.
The nurse peeked her head in. "You ready?" At Harm's nod, she pushed open the door and wheeled the isolette over to the bed.
"If you need anything just push the button." She set a small plastic pitcher of water and a cup on the table next to the bed and was gone as fast as she had appeared.
Harm reached into the isolette and tenderly picked up the baby. He turned toward Mac with a large smile on his face. "I'd like you to meet..." He set the baby into the crook of Mac's arm. "...our son."
Mac's eyes filled with tears. She could barely see her newborn son. The tears finally spilled over and she was able to gaze upon the son she had so desperately wanted. The nine months of waiting were over. She had gotten her wish. Her index finger traced a path from his forehead and down his small nose. She lifted the tiny hand with her finger, which he instinctively grasped. She looked up at Harm for a minute before turning her gaze back toward her son.
The baby stirred in his mother's arms and his eyes popped open. Large brown eyes stared into small Rabb blue ones.
Six weeks later
0627 Zulu (0127 EST)
Mac's Apartment
Georgetown
Mac climbed into bed after Harm. She scooted up behind him and wrapped her arms around him. He had gotten up with her for every middle-of-the-night feeding since the baby’s birth. She gently rubbed her hands across his abdomen and up his chest, ruffling the hairs and teasing his nipples. Her hands moved their assault in a southerly direction, gliding over his hips and down his thighs, just to caress a shapely buttock.
"Mac?"
"It's okay.”
He rolled over to face her. "Are you sure?"
"I saw the doctor today and she said everything was fine." She kissed him hungrily. She broke off abruptly. "Oh, wait. I have something for you." She rolled away and slid open the bedside table drawer. "Stick out your hand and close your eyes," she said as she resumed her position.
Harm obediently closed his eyes and stuck out his hand. He felt her place a small item on his open palm.
"Okay."
He opened his eyes and looked at his hand. He grinned widely as he made out a small flat, foil package.